Moving on from bitterness

There was a time when I was bitter. I was bitter because I felt wronged and I was angry. I didn’t know yet how to deal with my anger so I turned it into bitterness. Bitterness for my situation that I felt I was in because of the actions of others. I was bitter because I felt that I was wronged by someone that I thought had my back and I was bitter for being left alone. I was bitter for a few years to the point I could not let anyone in. I fought against everyone and everything and my reasoning behind it was its everyone else issue not mines because I knew who I was or at least I thought I knew who I was. I was angry at someone for years because they put me in my position of hopelessness. “They did this to me”, “it was their fault”, I would tell myself and I was stuck in bitterness.

So are bitter? If so then why? Are you jealous? Do you hold grudges and you act out to get attention? Are you always negative or a Debbie downer? When we are bitter how many of us really will admit to that? It’s easy to say that your mad or you don’t like something but how many of us are willing to say that we are bitter? And if you admit to it do you know why? I know of some women and men  that have been bitter for YEARS and I just don’t understand how you can be stuck in one emotion for so long? And it also makes me want to ask  if that is how you feel after all these years what have you done to change the situation?

Are you going to be the change you wanna see?   I think for me I hate when I see people that look like me (black) stuck in one negative emotion. If you complain about finding a man okay well what are you doing to find one? If you tried online dating try something else…if you have tried more than 2 or 3 things then maybe it’s not your time to find a man. you are letting your frustrating of cant finding someone turn you bitter. IF your complain about your child’s father look at the situation and see what you can do to change if…if you have tried everything then ask yourself why are you really mad? Are you mad that he has moved on and you haven’t? Or are you mad that you are the primary parent and you have to take on all the reasonability? Either way your anger isn’t going to help you raise a child. I can understand the frustration of having to be the sole parent and seeing the other parent not having to struggle or be a part of the daily parenting but that’s life. The only thing you can control is your home and what you do…what the other parent is doing isn’t going to do anything for you but frustrate you and then make you bitter about it.

The way I moved on from bitterness is I questioned myself.  I wanted to know why I was mad. So since I asked the question now I have to find the answer. After confronting those who I felt wronged me I realized something.  The only person that is going to care about you is you. And I had to realize that people are going to do what they feel is best for them and sometimes that means at your expense. I thought I was mad at the person who I felt done me wrong, whole time I should have realized that the person did what they needed to do to protect them and I need to do the same. Now I’m not excusing people who are out here doing harm to people or who are out here trying to hurt someone but what I’m saying is once you feel that a person has wronged you how are you doing to move on from it?

If your baby daddy left you and now your mad…..how are you going to move on from it?

If your boyfriend broke up with you after 5 years…how are you going to move on from it?

If you take 5 steps forward just to be knocked down 8…how are you going to move on from it?

I think when you are stuck in one emotion and you can’t move on…the problems is yours now and you cant blame anyone but you.